Demons

These wounds.

You opened them.

Because you saw that they were infected.

You realized I was weak.

I told myself I was fine.

Then I woke up.

Reality

*slap*

Emotions covered in denial came seeping out like puss.

*pop*

I tried to cover it up

But you saw right through me

Why’d you have to do that

Now I’m sick.

My brain has been taken over by the demons inside of me.

My heart beats faster now.

Faster now than ever.

My lungs breathe heavier now.

Heavier than before.

I run my hands through my hair.

Why am I like this

Why is this me.

No one can ever love me.

I build walls instead of breaking them down.

I scare people away with the demons shrieking inside of me.

You saw right through me.

How dare you.

I couldn’t fool you.

Now look at me.

How long have I been laying here

The world is spinning faster now.

The demons rip me apart.

Piece.

By.

Piece.

As I dig my nails into the floor.

*scream*

If I scream it stops.

For a second.

Enough time for me to breathe clean air.

Help.

No nevermind don’t.

It’ll only get worse.

I’ll scare you.

You’ll walk away.

Then I’m all alone.

Wait.

Come back.

No.

Stay back.

It’s a trap.

To ruin me.

Will this ever end

This mental illness inside of me

I’m running

Faster

And

Faster

But it only gets worse.

Day

by

Day

I try again.

Someday I will win.

Until then goodbye.

Don’t come near me.

Save yourself.

I’ll be okay.

Go home.

I’m used to this.

I’m used to

Being

Alone.

2 thoughts on “Demons

  1. It reminds me of adolescence. I recall many of those deep dark feelings. I have found comfort in knowing God is not a stranger even in the dark places of my life. The beauty of your poetry reveals an honesty that releases others to dare to look inside. Thank you Hannah.

    Like

    1. You are very welcome! I’m glad it touched you. I believe the very same thing and God has certainly been there pulling me out of the darkness. His power is amazing. He will pick you up every time you fall.

      Like

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